Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 564

“Kawaki, no matter what, what you said is too harsh…” Gintoki reminded with a frown.

“No, not harsh at all,” Kawaki replied casually. “It’s just the truth. People who lose their love over such things are just scum. From the beginning, I’ve been wondering what the point of this tournament is. If you really want to decide a winner, it should be about your love for your girlfriends! You guys are the worst!”

“Excuse me! Kawaki-san! My love for Miss Baimai will not lose to anyone!” Shinpachi adjusted his glasses and declared earnestly.

“Huh? Really?” Kawaki dug his ear and then glanced at the host. “Hey, can we announce the results now?”

“Eh? Now? Although the final match is just a formality, but now…”

“Yeah, now, I can’t wait anymore,” Kawaki waved his hand impatiently.

“Then, the final match winner is… Kawaki from the Harem Team!!” the host announced loudly.

“What——?!” Instantly, everyone expressed their confusion.

“Sorry, Shinpachi, the result of this match was decided from the start,” Kawaki continued. “It’s hard to accept, right? Of course, because this competition wasn’t about love, but simply… a contest of the girlfriend’s charm.”

With that, the big screen split into three parts, each recording the values from Kawaki’s three gaming devices. Apart from Hirako’s value, the other two… were at max, including the charm value.

“Almost forgot, there’s one more person,” Kawaki turned to the gentle Hirako behind him. “Sorry, I broke your O-Form.”

When Kawaki finished speaking, a dazzling light emerged from around Hirako. After two seconds, a beautiful, long-haired woman appeared before everyone when the light dissipated.

“It’s… it’s okay,” Hirako lowered her head, blushing slightly.

“Who… who is that?!” Gintoki ranted wildly. “Who is this woman?! Why can an apology transform her like that? Why is an apology more effective than full-body plastic surgery?!”

Gintoki mimicked Kawaki’s expression and tone, “Sorry, I broke your O-Form.”

However… it had no effect at all.

“Not working at all!” Gintoki yelled, grabbing his head in frustration.

“See,” Kawaki pointed to the screen showing everyone’s MAX charm value, then to Baimai and the other two glowing in gold next to him, shrugging, “Is there any need to continue the charm contest?”

“No… no way, Miss Baimai can’t lose to… Kawaki-san…” Shinpachi fell to his knees, clutching his head in despair.

“And me, I haven’t given up easily, boss,” Sougo smirked. I’ve always wanted to challenge the boss, my S against your S. Let’s see who’s better.”

“Stop it. I won’t play such a boring training game with a woman I like. Besides, you just treat her as a toy, right?” Kawaki waved his hand, kindly reminding, “By the way, a kind reminder, treating women as toys has serious consequences.”

“Boss, are you scared?” Sougo sneered.

But just as he finished speaking, Sougo stumbled and fell to the ground. “Eh? What’s going on?” Sougo looked up to see a sadistic Shoko with a whip, stepping on his back with a queenly outfit, smiling evilly.

“Master… the offense… has turned into defense~” Shoko licked her lips playfully, “I want you to experience… the joy of being a pig! Ahahaha…”

“Boss! You…!!” Sougo suddenly remembered something. When he took Shoko away from Kondo, Kawaki glanced at Shoko.

“Ah, I made a slight move. Just before you took her from the gorilla,” Kawaki admitted honestly. Of course, even without it, she would have turned. As I said before, treating women as toys is dangerous.”

Kawaki suddenly remembered something. He ignored Sougo’s screams, so he raised a finger and smiled, “By the way, I prefer to be the dominant person in bed.”

“Hey, what’s with the sudden dirty talk?” Gintoki retorted expressionlessly.

“Anyway, if it were a ‘My Wife is the Best’ contest, I’ve already won,” Kawaki continued, ignoring Gintoki’s retort. “But… if it’s about something else, like love for your girlfriend… I probably wouldn’t even make it past the preliminaries. So… I forfeit.”

Everyone stared at Kawaki in disbelief.

Kawaki turned back to Baimai, Shoko, and Hirako, apologetically saying, “Sorry, I don’t like you three at all. To be honest, I don’t feel anything.”

“We know,” the three responded softly.

“Good,” Kawaki smiled lightly, “Although I consider myself a mature adult, I can’t say I like someone I don’t feel for. So, goodbye.”

Kawaki waved and walked towards Tsukuyo.

“Um…” Kawaki stopped before Tsukuyo, scratching his head in frustration. “Congratulations. Although Hiyori and the others asked me, what you want to hear now should just be congratulations, right? And you haven’t heard it yet, have you? Let me be the first, congratulations and wish you eternal happiness. Love… in both reality and games, I’m always a mess, but even I know, when others are happy… just bless them.”

“Tha… thank you,” Tsukuyo nodded lightly.

“Love what you love boldly, I’ll explain to Hiyori,” Kawaki continued. No one has the right to interfere with others’ love, even if it’s virtual or imagined. Also, Hiyori and the others are worried about you. If you have time, greet them and bring your boyfriend. Shinpachi, your sister, is worried about you. If possible, talk to her when you go back. Has blind and twisted love blinded you? Then, goodbye…”

“Wait…” Tsukuyo gently pulled Kawaki’s sleeve, “I… I’ll go back too.”

“Huh? Why?” Kawaki turned, puzzled. “Honestly, among so many disgusting dates, only yours was barely watchable. You could have won the championship if this contest was about ‘Love for Wife.'”

“No, it’s okay.” Tsukuyo shook her head, tossed the gaming device into the air, said, “Going back,” and walked towards the door.

Kawaki smiled, crossing his arms into his sleeves, and strolled towards the door.

Gintoki watched Shinpachi on stage, unable to accept the situation, and said calmly, “Stand up, Shinpachi, it’s not over. This is just the beginning for you. Someday, you’ll truly love someone from the heart.”

“Gin-san…” Shinpachi looked up at Gintoki, stunned.

“So don’t just play games, face reality too.”

“Mm!”

At that moment, the host, after discussing with the judges, returned to the stage and called out to Kawaki, “Mr. Kawaki over there, are you really forfeiting? The judges unanimously agreed to rename this contest from ‘My Wife is the Best’ to ‘Love for Wife is the Best.'”

Hearing this, Kawaki stopped at the door and raised his hand without turning back: “If it’s that kind of contest, I wouldn’t even pass the preliminaries. Goodbye…”

“What a pity, then… for the championship, the finals continue!” the host announced. “But the rules have changed to a contest of love for the girlfriend! Ready?!”

“Oh!!” Kawaki, who had unknowingly returned to the audience, raised his fist and shouted.

After a long silence, the host looked expressionlessly at Kawaki, “Mr. Kawaki?”

“Don’t mind it, just kidding,” Kawaki chuckled. “The real competition starts now!”

“Uh, if I remember correctly, you said you don’t love your girlfriends…” Shinpachi murmured, adjusting his glasses.

“You remembered wrong.” Kawaki denied this without hesitation and then opened his arms to embrace Baimai, Shoko, and Hirako. “Of course I love… all three of you.”

“Dear~” The three instantly clung to Kawaki, rubbing against him desperately.

Remembering Kawaki’s words, “I consider myself a mature adult, but I can’t say I like someone I don’t feel for,” Gintoki retorted expressionlessly, “Where’s the mature adult?”

“Going back…” Tsukuyo’s voice suddenly came from behind Kawaki.

Half a minute later, everyone stared expressionlessly at Kawaki being dragged by Tsukuyo. Several kunai were stuck in his head, and his eyes were rolling white and occasionally twitching.

“Mr. Kawaki?” the host called weakly.

“Wa…wait… for me… I’ll… be back…” Kawaki said weakly, leaving a long trail of blood.

“Undoubtedly, it’s love,” Gintoki commented.

“Yes, love for the game,” Shinpachi added quietly.

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