Naruto World: Acquiring the Dung Fruit and Joining the Second War - Chapter 82
Chapter 82: The Worst
Hatake Sakumo went into hiding, originally, the defeat of the Sand Shinobi was a significant event, but he didn’t know how to express his admiration for Chiba.
He couldn’t say, “Wow, your power is incredible!”
Just thinking about uttering those words made him feel unable to open his mouth. Crouching in the corner of the camp, Hatake Sakumo pondered what to do for a while – he decided to send a battle report to the village.
“Third Kazekage was washed away by shit?”
“The Sand Shinobi troops were flooded with feces?”
He really didn’t want to write such a repulsive battle report. But if he didn’t write it, he would be disregarding the truth.
Boom! Boom! Boom!
At that moment, several burly men approached from the edge of the position, obviously seeking a good hiding spot. However, as soon as they reached the corner, they saw Hatake Sakumo.
“Eh? Master Sakumo?”
“How did you end up here?”
Looking at his subordinates, Hatake felt embarrassed. He had found a clean hiding spot, but who would have thought these guards would also come here to seek refuge? Previously, he saw them running in the opposite direction.
“That… We offended Master Chiba, so we came here to hide.”
“Master Chiba?”
Hatake Sakumo was taken aback. Before, he referred to them as little bastards, but now they called him Chiba-sama.
“What is he doing now?”
“Ah? It seems like he’s eating.”
“Eating?”
Hearing the word ‘eating,’ Hatake felt a bit nauseous. How could anyone eat in this situation?
The Sand Shinobi camp was covered in feces, and Chiba was eating. Suddenly, Hatake Sakumo slapped his forehead. He had almost forgotten something important.
“Now, I’ll give you a task.”
His expression turned serious as he spoke solemnly.
“Arm yourselves now, rush to the Sand Shinobi position, and strike at the Sand Shinobi! Don’t be afraid, I’ll cover you from behind!”
“Yes!”
The several men were filled with excitement. Head harvesting? Was there a better mission than this?
Soon after, the eight guards charged out of the position, holding their machetes. They seemed to have forgotten that Hatake Sakumo hadn’t even stepped out of the position but remained on the observation tower.
“Let’s go!”
“I’m going to take down a hundred of them in no time.”
“My sword is already thirsty for blood!”
“Please call me the Konoha Chopping King.”
The eight men rushed towards the canyon, brimming with determination. However, as they approached the canyon, their run turned into a trot, and the trot turned into a walk. Finally, they simply stopped.
“Gwoockk… The smell is so overpowering, I can’t run past it!”
“The canyon is filled with feces. The smell is so nauseating… Gwoockk!”
“Isn’t Master Sakumo supposed to protect us? What about the others? Gwoockk…”
“No, I can’t take it anymore! Gwoockk!”
The eight men were overwhelmed by the stench emanating from the canyon, and they even dropped their machetes. In the end, they couldn’t bear it any longer.
Whoosh! Whoosh! Whoosh!
They threw kunai and explosive tags blindly into the canyon, then turned around and ran away.
…
Observation tower.
Hatake Sakumo witnessed the scene and displayed an expression of “as expected.” He knew the stench from the canyon must be intense, so he sent a few men to test it out. As expected, the feces had an overpowering odor.
“With such a strong smell, how can we harvest the Sand Shinobi?” Hatake Sakumo pondered.
He understood that the feces couldn’t eliminate all the Sand Shinobi, and a significant portion of them would surely escape. Understanding that fact was one thing, but due to the obstructive smell of Ollie, the Sand Shinobi were once again covered in feces.
If they were to fight in this situation, there was a high chance they would end up splattered in it.
…
In the canyon ten miles away from both sides’ positions.
A group of Sand Shinobi, covered in filth, fled in embarrassment. Upon closer inspection, Third Kazekage was among them. At this moment, Third Kazekage’s entire body was coated in Ollie, and his pant pockets were sagging.
His steps were unsteady, supported by two subordinates as he stumbled forward.
“I never expected, I truly never expected that Chiba could cause people to have diarrhea!”
Third Kazekage had anticipated many of his opponent’s abilities, but he hadn’t anticipated diarrhea. Moreover, after this attack, he was completely defeated.
Puff! Puff!
With his feet submerged in dung water over half a meter deep, Third Kazekage remained silent. He had lost, not only had he been defeated, but he had also experienced diarrhea in front of thousands of subordinates.
This was a stain on his reputation, one that he wouldn’t be able to erase easily. Suddenly, a subordinate ran over.
“Master Kazekage, the end of the canyon is just ahead. We need to climb up.”
“Um.”
Weakly responding, Third Kazekage maintained a stoic expression. He had become numb to the smell of shit by now. Even though his face was covered in it, Kazekage couldn’t be bothered to wipe it off.
Soon, the Sand Shinobi threw ropes and began climbing up. After a while, it was Third Kazekage’s turn. Climbing could only be done one person at a time.
But now, Third Kazekage was in a terrible state. In order to uphold what little dignity he had left, he could only grit his teeth.
Bear the pain hands-on. However, halfway through the climb, Third Kazekage couldn’t hold on any longer.
Puff!
Puff!
“Look, everyone! Kazekage-sama has fallen!”
“What a disaster! Hurry up and help Kazekage-sama!”
“You’ve got it wrong! This is Kazekage-sama’s foot!”
“Ah? Kazekage-sama has fainted…”
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